The Greatest Love

face to faceMaria was very concerned with how she looked, especially her teeth. She was just not pleased with her image on the mirror. She had gone dentist hoping, feeling that each had only made her look worse. She went to have her nose fix, but they did a poor job. Each professional only mirrored her belief that she was ugly. Actually there is nothing wrong with how she looked.

Tina had a terrible breath that made people uncomfortable being around her. She was a theology student so her outer demeanor vibrated with piety and spirituality. Beneath this was a raging current of anger and jealousy that exploded from time to time, when thoughts of how a certain person was threatening her position. Her inner thoughts were expressed through her breath, and she was offensive even when she pretended to love. No one threaten her but herself.

We may know of people in similar situation – we may even be in it. We may scold and criticize ourselves endlessly. There could have been a time when praises and compliments surprised us, even made us feel uncomfortable. Again, criticism or reprimand seemed be safer water to tread. And if someone else expressed their love, sometimes we may have felt, “Why me?” – Or “You might be mistaking me for someone you know.” The belief that we are unlovable seems to be prevalent.

There is a litany of other negativities that could be included: we procrastinate on things that could benefit us. We are quite afraid to charge a decent price for our services. We create illness or pain in our body. We live in chaos and disorder, as reflected in how our house is arranged or how we work. We may even be attracting lovers and mates who belittle us.

By denying ourselves of our good, we show how we regard ourselves. Try to see these examples:

The husband is grouchy and tired; the wife wonders what she could have done to cause it.

A friend takes you out once or twice and never calls again. You think something must be wrong with you.

The marriage ends and one feels he/she is a failure.

An employee is afraid to ask for a raise.

We don’t close the sale or get the position we aim for and we are sure we are not good enough.

We mistreat our body with food, alcohol, or drugs.

A person is afraid of intimacy and allowing anyone to get close, so he/she has superficial friendships.

We can’t seem to make decisions and put other people on the spot to make decisions for us because we are quite sure that if we make them they will be wrong.

What about you, how do you show your lack of self-worth?

Problems and situations may be different but at the root of all these is how much we love ourselves. Some of you might even react on this, thinking that loving yourself is vanity or some kind of arrogance, an utter to conceit. These are beliefs that have nothing to do with love, but springs from fear. When we love ourselves, we respect ourselves and express gratitude for the miracle of our body and mind.

Loving ourselves can burst and overflow in all directions. Consequently, we feel love for the very process of life itself. We feel joy in being alive so we see beauty everywhere, in another person. We are curious and strive to learn more about how the universe works in us. Love is the miracle cure. Loving ourselves cures and transforms our lives.

Thanks to Marilitz “thoughts”.

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