The Greatest Love

face to faceMaria was very concerned with how she looked, especially her teeth. She was just not pleased with her image on the mirror. She had gone dentist hoping, feeling that each had only made her look worse. She went to have her nose fix, but they did a poor job. Each professional only mirrored her belief that she was ugly. Actually there is nothing wrong with how she looked.

Tina had a terrible breath that made people uncomfortable being around her. She was a theology student so her outer demeanor vibrated with piety and spirituality. Beneath this was a raging current of anger and jealousy that exploded from time to time, when thoughts of how a certain person was threatening her position. Her inner thoughts were expressed through her breath, and she was offensive even when she pretended to love. No one threaten her but herself.

We may know of people in similar situation – we may even be in it. We may scold and criticize ourselves endlessly. There could have been a time when praises and compliments surprised us, even made us feel uncomfortable. Again, criticism or reprimand seemed be safer water to tread. And if someone else expressed their love, sometimes we may have felt, “Why me?” – Or “You might be mistaking me for someone you know.” The belief that we are unlovable seems to be prevalent.

There is a litany of other negativities that could be included: we procrastinate on things that could benefit us. We are quite afraid to charge a decent price for our services. We create illness or pain in our body. We live in chaos and disorder, as reflected in how our house is arranged or how we work. We may even be attracting lovers and mates who belittle us.

By denying ourselves of our good, we show how we regard ourselves. Try to see these examples:

The husband is grouchy and tired; the wife wonders what she could have done to cause it.

A friend takes you out once or twice and never calls again. You think something must be wrong with you.

The marriage ends and one feels he/she is a failure.

An employee is afraid to ask for a raise.

We don’t close the sale or get the position we aim for and we are sure we are not good enough.

We mistreat our body with food, alcohol, or drugs.

A person is afraid of intimacy and allowing anyone to get close, so he/she has superficial friendships.

We can’t seem to make decisions and put other people on the spot to make decisions for us because we are quite sure that if we make them they will be wrong.

What about you, how do you show your lack of self-worth?

Problems and situations may be different but at the root of all these is how much we love ourselves. Some of you might even react on this, thinking that loving yourself is vanity or some kind of arrogance, an utter to conceit. These are beliefs that have nothing to do with love, but springs from fear. When we love ourselves, we respect ourselves and express gratitude for the miracle of our body and mind.

Loving ourselves can burst and overflow in all directions. Consequently, we feel love for the very process of life itself. We feel joy in being alive so we see beauty everywhere, in another person. We are curious and strive to learn more about how the universe works in us. Love is the miracle cure. Loving ourselves cures and transforms our lives.

Thanks to Marilitz “thoughts”.

Reblog this post [with Zemanta]

Past Links From the Past

couple1We often say that, “Don’t cry over spilled milk.” The past is done over and done with. We should turn the book of life if we want to get anywhere. We cannot change the past. Why delve in it when the present already offers much to think about? Is there any value in the past?
The past may be gone but it has left its imprints in the present. We are what we are today
because of the past. Our thoughts, attitudes, our beliefs today are results of the past. In fact, the impression may be so deep that we may be pushing now because someone had hurt us before. Some people put up a hard façade as a form of defense from the pain. Deep resentment patterns influence us today.
Why wait to be the life’s knife-edge and panic before we resolve these resentments? Now is the time to dissolve and resolve these resentments. In the state of panic, it will be very difficult to focus the minds on the healing work. So right now, we simply have to take some time off to deal with those hidden fears first.
If we believe we are helpless and victims of the past, nature will support us in that belief. We vindicate ourselves and foolishly go down the drain due to such beliefs. This is why we must release ourselves from outmoded, negative ideas, and beliefs that we are not maintaining nor nourishing us. As I’ve told my friends,” Why do you’ve need to strap this heavy load on your back? You don’t need to. You can snip it off and be a happier person.”
To release ourselves from the past, it is vital that we forgive not just others, but especially ourselves. Forgiveness may not come that easily. We may not know how nor even want to forgive, but if we are aware that we must and, at least, are willing to forgive, our healing process begins.
For us to heal, it is essential to release ourselves from the past and forgive everyone. “I forgive you for not being the way I wanted you to be. I forgive you for your shortcomings and set you free.” To come to the point of even saying that may take a lot from us but this is how we heal ourselves.
In the Course of Miracles, it is stated, “All disease comes from a state of unforgiving” and “Whenever we are ill, we need to look around to see whom it is that we need to forgive.” When we are ill, we need to search from within the depths of our hearts to see whom it is we need to forgive. Quite revealing that the very person whom you’re least incline to forgive is the one you need to let go of the most. When we forgive, it doesn’t mean we now condoning or consenting to that person’s behavior or the situation. Forgiveness means letting go. We may not even know how to forgive but to bring to ourselves to want to do so invite nature to step in and take care of the rest.
No one understands our own pain as much as we do. It is easier for us to lock ourselves in what we are going through and forget others who are involved in that experience. Often, it is also difficult for us to understand that those we need to forgive the most are also in pain. We need to understand that those people are doing the best they can with the understanding, awareness and knowledge they have at the moment.
Just as we accept others and try to understand the way they are, we should the same to ourselves. Again, this not to condoned nor justify any mistakes we’ve made, but this must be an acceptance and love for ourselves. From there, we can work out what needs to be done. The past can be change by changing our attitudes about it. But first we must not reject or punish ourselves. This creates many miracles in our life in terms of an improved health, more fulfilling relationships and even more money. We begin to loosen up and express ourselves in more creative, fulfilling ways. It’s almost like magic: everything seems to happen without our even trying too hard.
When we love and approve of ourselves, we create a space of trust and acceptance which in turn creates some organization in or mind. More loving relationships in our life, attraction of a new job and a better place to live in. people who love themselves and their bodies neither abuse neither themselves nor others. Charity begins at home. No charity begins with oneself.
Thanks to Marilitz “thoughts”.

Reblog this post [with Zemanta]